Short Tails – Episode 7

In this edition of Short Tails, I’m not going to be looking back too far, just to February 2024 and what we now refer to as the Hanoi Birthday Dash.


The Hanoi Birthday Dash

Hanoi traffic

During our month in Vietnam’s capital city Hanoi, we booked a trip to Ha Long Bay. The stunning rock formations and waterways on Vietnam’s northeastern coastline are a staple of any trip to Vietnam and it was somewhere we had wanted to visit for a long time. If you have ever seen anyone on Instagram in Vietnam, chances are they have posted from Ha Long Bay.

It was Hannah’s birthday so we booked an overnight stay on a cruise ship with all meals, transfers, and activities included. We went all out but being Vietnam, it still cost less than your average night away in a British city.

The trip itself surpassed our expectations. The food was incredible, our cabin with water views and a private balcony was one of the finest rooms we’ve ever stayed in, and the whole process was brilliantly organized. That was, apart from the very first leg of the journey.


Getting to the Pick Up

waterways and green rock formation in Ha Long Bay
Ha Long Bay

The trip to Ha Long Bay from Hanoi is around 2.5 hours, so we opted to include transfers in our booking for a small additional charge. It was a no-brainer as we didn’t fancy traversing northern Vietnam by ourselves. The only problem was that the transfer company would only collect from Hanoi’s Old Quarter and we were staying outside the city in Ocean Park.

We didn’t think this would be an issue despite the 8 am departure time, we would simply get a taxi to a cafe in the Old Quarter and arrange for the minibus to pick us up there.

On the day of the booking, a Monday morning, we got up extra early, allowing us almost 2 hours to get up and make the 30 min trip into Hanoi. It was then the problems began.


The Ticking Clock

the deck of a ship looking out on to water and other boats
The Deck of our ship

We have used Grab (an Uber equivalent) all over Asia and I can count the times on my left hand when no cars were available. You always get a driver! Thinking it would be a Monday morning and everyone would be heading into work there would be an ample supply of Grab drivers. This was far from the truth.

With 90 minutes to make a 30-minute journey, we started searching for a Grab, only for it repeatedly to find no one, not a soul! We asked the apartment block concierge to call us a taxi as we spoke zero Vietnamese, but nothing was available.

The tour company had previously told us that the minibus had other collections to make and a departing ship to catch, so the driver would not hang around more than a few minutes waiting for anyone to turn up. Time evaporates in this situation and 45 minutes trying to get a taxi disappeared in what felt like a few very stressful seconds.


Any Car Will Do

balcony view of Ha Long Bay
Our balcony view

Whilst I furiously and fruitlessly tried to order Grabs and instructed the nice man at the front desk to keep calling taxis, I sent Hannah to the road to hail anything that looked remotely like a taxi.

With the deadline approaching, the receptionist informed me a taxi was coming, but I had strong doubts that anything would arrive. With exactly 30 minutes left to make the journey, an unmarked black car pulled up and two women got out. Throwing caution to the wind I got in and said ‘Taxi?’, he gave me a surprised look and nodded in confirmation.

Yelling Hannah from her taxi-hailing position on the street I showed the guy the address and offered him double the usual fare ($6 as opposed to $3!) to get us to our transfer on time.


Hanoi Traffic

crazy traffic

Now, the journey was only like 6 miles but Hanoi traffic is some of the most crazy traffic I have ever seen. It is a sight to behold with mopeds cutting up the cars, driving down the wrong side of the road, and all perceptions of a highway code abandoned. Usually, it’s pretty scary and you buckle up but this morning I informed our driver to make all possible maneuvers to beat the hoards.

Watching the ETA on my Google Maps live journey we knew we would be painfully close to making our transfer, but we needed the Hanoi traffic Gods to play ball. I had the coach driver’s number and texted him our live position, his response was – ‘I wait 5 minutes’.

Never have I experienced a more stressful journey but as we rocked up to the final set of traffic lights we could see our coach waiting outside the pre-agreed coffee shop in the Old Quarter.


Stop the Bus!

woman smiling on a boat
We made it! On the taxi boat to the cruise ship.

Out of time but with the coach in sight, Hannah abandoned me in the taxi and brazenly traversed Hanoi traffic to stop the departing bus in its tracks. I threw the cash and a tip at the driver with my eternal thanks and sprinted to join Hannah at the coach.

We crashed into our seats, apologizing to the other passengers as we did so. The bus doors closed, and panting as if we had just run a marathon, we set off for Ha Long Bay.


Ha Long Bay

sunbeds on the deck of a cruise ship.
All the stress was worth it!

After our Hanoi dash, everything greatly improved. It was a nice journey across Northern Vietnam to Ha Long Bay and the cruise itself was better than we could have hoped for.

We drank wine whilst cruising around the bay, watching the stunning rock formations appear from the grey mist. We feasted, birthday-style on the buffets and had a couples massage whilst the majority of the cruise headed out on an expedition.

I had even organized for the crew to supply a birthday cake the following morning for Hannah’s birthday. The entire ship sang her Happy Birthday and enjoyed a slice of cake. It was a brilliant end to an excellent trip.


Conclusion

a birthday cake with three candles
Hannah’s birthday cake, they seem to have cautiously guessed her age.

I don’t know why we didn’t book a private taxi ahead of time. We do it all the time when arriving in new countries where we don’t know the lay of the land. It only costs a few bucks more than a Grab and you get the security of knowing you have a driver.

Lessons learned and moving forward we will always pre-book a car to avoid the same situation happening again.

Do you know the most annoying thing about it? We had to get a taxi west into the city to catch a transfer going east to Ha Long Bay. So our transfer to Ha Long Bay actually drove us back straight past our apartment in Ocean Park, where our stressful journey had begun only a few hours prior!


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